Thursday, April 3, 2008

Almost definitely not a Christmas baby

Hello, My Love,

Well, it looks as if you will not be a Christmas baby. I started spotting yesterday and still going on this morning. When I saw it yesterday I was so upset. I was mad beyond any kind of anger I've known before. I had such an awful day that when I saw it when I got home it was just too much for me to handle. I had to deal with a pain in the butt parent earlier in the day and this is one of those people who is never pleased. She always has a complaint or a concern or an issue that needs to be addressed. Each week I have bent over backwards or jumped through hoops for her. Well, yesterday was no exception. After we resolved the issue over the phone she tells me that she is expecting. All I could say was, "Congratulations." Why does this woman, a person who makes my work life so friggin difficult, get to have yet another baby while I can't even get pregnant with one????? I just don't get it. Why do some people get pregnant at the blink of an eye while others do everything they can to get pregnant and don't? I just want to know why. WHY? I'm so frustrated and upset and angry and sad and just plain pissed off that I can't even think straight.

1 comment:

Jen said...

Ah, Kate!! I am SO super sorry! Why some people pop out kids like a pez dispenser and other's try and try and try has always baffled me! It sucks! It's not fair and you be as pissed as you want to be!! Who knew that hearing 'I'm pregnant' from some random person or seeing a baby bump would make you cry and scream? It's not fair. You deserve parenthood! Don't give up. This will make you stronger! And when you have your baby you can tell them 'You were wanted and loved long before you got here'!